The Razor’s Edge

Why I'm thinking of resigning as Scoutmaster and why it may be a good thing. 

Yes you read that right. The man who for the past almost 8 years who has bled khaki, is thinking about hanging up the expedition hat. This weekend at our campout I told my Scouts that if things continued as is I was resigning as Scoutmaster and would help anyone interested to find another Troop.
For at least six months now we've been having a problem within the troop of repeated infighting. For the most part it's been arguing or bickering and on occasion physical, though never to all out fisticuffs. At the center of the conflict, two patrol mates that a few years back were best friends but unfortunately no longer so. The other patrol members that are usually in attendance aren't much better and if not direct contributors are often guilty of adding fuel to the fire. If I had to sum it up I'd say that it's really a lack of respect for each other. 
I don't mean to paint these Scouts as bad young men. They all have good hearts and their Scoutcraft skills are strong, each having one if not more skills that they excel in. But when it comes down to intra-patrol relations they are all failing. We are a small troop - barely 8 strong and of those only half are regular attendees whether at meetings or monthly campouts. I cannot separate them to different patrols to put a healthy edge on the competition as there are barely enough to run one patrol to begin with. At least half a dozen meetings have been interrupted by the fighting amongst the Scouts. At summer camp things came to a head with one Scout expressing thoughts so negative I had no recourse but to advise his parents that counseling at a level of experience much higher than I could provide may be in order. We've sat down a number of times to talk through their conflicts. It seems to help and on a number of occasions and their parents have said things along the lines of "I don't know what you said to them but it seems to have made a big difference" - unfortunately that doesn't seem to stick. 
At this past weekend's campout things erupted once again and I brought the Scouts together and told them that if things continued like this I was going to step down as Scoutmaster. It's not fair to the adults who give up their weekends to have to act as referees every time we get together. It isn't fair to the other Scouts that every time they are together their adventures have to be interrupted with these "counseling sessions." Every once in a while I could see, but not nearly every time we get together. I told the Scouts to gather their chairs and bring them to a section of the campsite outside my view and hearing. I told them they needed to do some soul searching and decide what they wanted to do as far as the future of the troop. They need to work together peacefully and as a team and have a way to work out their conflicts when they inevitably occur. If that wasn't something they could all agree to do and do consistently then I would be calling the head of our chartering organization and telling him that I was done. In February there should be another group of Scouts crossing into the troop. The behavior they've been demonstrating is not how they should be setting the example for the new Scouts. How could they expect to lead a new group when they can't work together amongst themselves without constant fighting. 
There's a good chance that my stepping down could mean the folding of the troop. It's up to the CO if they would replace me, but I know any of the few active adults in the troop aren't looking to step into the position. Another parent who's been with me on most of the outings agrees that this unhealthy quarreling has gone on far too long. And while the Scouts are respected and appreciated by the community (primarily from the different civics organizations we've served in the town), the town parents fail to see the value of Scouting and are more concerned with the .00001% chance that their child may have a future as a professional athlete. It's their choice to make. Very few I expect will understand that I am looking at leaving Scouting because I love it so much. What would this mean for my own son? I would gladly (and very strongly encourage) him to join another troop. At first I thought I would at least join the committee of whatever troop he chose but I'm not sure about that either the more I think about it. For eight years now he's lived with his Scout leader. While I've tried to keep a balance between my role as his father and his Scout leader, that line has always been blurry. I will support him in his Scouting as his parent in whatever ways he needs, but maybe it's time that he get more of the independence that scouting fosters and to step out from the protection of his father being a part of every scout experience. We can always camp together in leisure and focus on OUR time together without Scouts being a factor. 
As far as my own involvement in Scouting that's still to be determined. I'm looking more and more to taking a lesser role. Anyone who's been following the blog knows that my involvement with ShelterBox has been becoming more and more of my focus. While the details haven't been determined yet I was recently asked to be part of a national committee to foster the relationship between Scouts and ShelterBox. Being a full-time volunteer for both organizations is taking more time than I have to give. It's taking more and more time away from my family, and considering that neither org involves a salary, there's my day job to be considered as well. I think I would still like to stay on as a merit badge counselor, likely for Emergency Preparedness and Wilderness Survival if accepted by our District. As of right now I haven't made a decision 100%. We'll see how things go over the next week or so. Other than my ASM who was with me on the campout I haven't shared my thoughts with any of the other parents yet (though some I believe do read the blog from time to time). A conversation with the District Director and our CO is in order as well depending on how things go. I believe in Scouting and what it has to offer young men and women. That's why it's so important to me that these boys, my son especially, have the environment where they can take advantage of all it has to offer. Providence has brought me this far. I believe that God has a plan for each one of us and maybe this is his way of pointing me to a new path. 
So continues the Scouter's Journey… Your comments are appreciated.

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